Health and other associated issues - Tips, Information and Guides
So You Wanna Have a College Degree Do Ya??
by: Arch McNab You come out of the front door of the house trailing drips of coffee and
loose scraps of paper leaving the kids screams and the wife’s ‘be
careful honey’ in your wake. Juggling everything you struggle to open the
door of the rust heap that you charitably call ‘the ride’. Once
inside you realize that you have left the keys dangling in the keylock. No
problem you think as you unwind the window thinking to yourself that well, at
least it isn’t a power window so you don’t have to drag your sorry
butt out of the car. As the window gives a little jerk and then a thud that
announces with a certain finality that, yes its off its track, you realize the
futility of congratulating yourself on anything today. “Today is a Monday, today is a Mondayâ€Â, squeak the protesting
windshield wipers as you move from the center of the street closer to the edge
trying to avoid the road spray of passing cars who seem to instinctively know
that your driver’s side window won’t roll up. Somehow the fact
that it’s almost March seems to make your wet left arm even colder and
you idly wonder if it’s possible to get pneumonia through a soggy
forearm. Luckily there’s a parking spot down at the far end of the lot,
well past the paved section but then if you’re five minutes late, you
have to take what is left. Five minutes late!! How could you possibly be five minutes late? You break
into a run for the door, ignoring the searing pain in your ankle as you twist it
on the broken edge of the pavement, hoping against hope that you can slip in and
make it to your work station undetected. You’re halfway down the hallway
before a head thrusts out and you’re trapped in the beady gaze of the
shift supervisor. He deigns to say anything, just turns his nose high and sniffs
disdainfully, but you can be sure that your tardiness has been duly recorded and
your meager pay-stub will reflect the gaffe. Now totally rattled, feeling a little subdued and a lot out of breath from
your little wind sprint across the parking lot, you grab your chipped coffee mug
and totter down to the pot. As usual, in the coffee pot, there is a new miracle
of physics on display. How, you wonder, is it possible to leave so little coffee
in the pot and still not feel that it’s somehow time to put on a new pot?
Surely, anyone with half a brain can see that there isn’t enough coffee
left to fill even a small thimble sized expresso cup. Just then the half-a-brain
that you were visualizing skips by the door stopping briefly to announce in
self-justifying tones that if they hadn’t put on a fresh pot because, you
see, the old one wasn’t all gone. Minutes later you’re back at your desk, head in your hands, eyes
squeezed shut you’re trying to visualize somewhere warm and tropical to
soothe the sudden migraine you feel coming on when your door is assaulted by a
rapping resembling a red cockaded woodpecker on steroids. The grim faced door
rapper disgorges the entire contents of his message in a machine-gun burst. Boss wants to see you in his office in fifteen minutes sharp!!
Don’t be late! Now your stomach really starts to churn, making you wish that, yes indeed,
you had taken the time to have breakfast this morning and that you
weren’t stuck in this dead end job and that yes, you had stayed on in
school and gone to college with all of your buddies. After all, it seemed as
though they had all done well, none of them working in this sweatshop like yours
truly drawing down a salary rivaling that of pimply faced mickdee’s rep,
you realize grimly. Leaving your work station, you notice on the computer monitor loaded with
the day’s drivel that passes for news, a tiny little box with one of
those annoying ‘click here’ logos. You squint at it, trying to make
out the blurry words that would be so much clearer if you hadn’t left
your glasses on the bathroom counter at home and wonder if those words are the
answer to your problems. ‘Get your college degree online!’
proclaims the info box nestled between late breaking news related to
Cher’s surgery abuse and claims about Brad’s fidelity or lack
thereof. Could you really do this? You, the guy that every neighbor loves to
have on his street, just so they can always feel superior to someone. But how would it all play out if you did what the
http://10-best-online-college-degrees.com/ suggested? What if you did
suddenly apply for an online college degree? And even more dizzying, what if you
went out and got it? Now your mind is in hyper-drive, imagining that day when
you can swagger on down the hall, so unlike the little journey you’re
about to embark upon now, and tell that little pinched faced desk dweller
exactly what you think of him, his job, and your “promising career of
creating plastic molds for fish-ponds. Hey, hang on. You’re not going to let that career ending thought
take over your mind. Not today. Today was shaping up to be one of those days
that really made a person stop and take stock. Not that there was a lot of stock
to take, in fact very little at all, truth be told. If you had stayed in school
and gone on to university or even college then things would be oh so different.
Well they would, wouldn’t they? Sure they would, your mind answers back.
And it’s not too late, in fact if those claims by these online schools
were true, in just a few short years you could really be graduating with one of
many online college degrees. It all sounded just a little bit too good to be
true, but still you file that away in your mind as you head down the hall,
footsteps dragging ever slower, rivaling those of the chained monster in a B
movie…….to be continued….
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